Guilt Guilt and More Guilt. I’m almost a Catholic.

I have all this guilt about not blogging, but I’ve just started a new big drawing (well big for me: A1) and I really can’t be doing any blogging now.

It’s too time consuming. Take this post for example, I thought

Ok quickie post:

Couple of lines,

chuck an image up

and then back to work.

Hi ho Hi ho

Instead I am now writing, editing images, cropping and spell checking. Fucking annoying.

Additionally I’ve been feeling really distracted lately. Unable to focus for more than 10 mins at a time.

This is troubling.

Unless there is a deadline I tend to drift. Fake deadlines don’t inspire me with the kind of panic and sense of urgency that a real deadline does. Instead of just finishing all the parts of the drawing, I chew my pencil, think, check Facebook, play a game. Dawdle endlessly.

Two weekends ago when the Ex was away at a Prince concert, it was the ideal time to bite down on that pencil and get some done. Instead I played a variety of internet games one after the other for hours at a time: Triple Town, Candy Crush, Farmville Saga, Monster Munch (or whatever it’s called who cares.), Fruit ninja, Where’s My Water. Sigh.

Then I had immense guilt about it. Even while I was playing the games I was feeling guilty.

Even though I knew I should close that hellish tab, turn off the game with its sweet, sweet game sounds of cheery beeps and boops I just couldn’t. My will power is all shot to hell.

I ask myself

What would Foz say?

UNACCEPTABLE!

 

PEDESTRIAN!

 

On the positive side at least my new year resolution of doing 3-4 big drawings and more sketch booking is on its way. Must focus.

But I’ve updated my website – Take a look if you fancy. My work finally gave me the go ahead to post up projects, so I’m slowly but surely working my way through all my design work.

I’ve also joined instagram now that I have an iPhone.

I resisted the lure of the iPhone for ages, then the ex out of sheer frustration (because the Sony Eriksson I was using had no internet and would die often) just went and got me a second-hand one for Xmas (yay!)

I highly recommend this route to get an iPhone: Just wait 6-7 years until you are so behind the tech curve that one of your loved ones just gives you one just because you’re such an annoying luddite.

So all teched up as I am, I’ve discarded my 10yearsofmediocrephotography blog and am just using instagram now. I don’t even use the Instagram camera – I’m just file dumping into a folder I sync with my iPhone.Sweetness! I have to admit it’s far easier than having to upload images to a blog, then add them to a post, then publish that post.

Jeez what was I thinking??

Follow me on instagram: I’m posting photos there regularly (since it requires much less thought and effort a post does.)

But with the sweets comes the bitter. I now have instagram jealousy.

Like those crazy-ass feeds where its’ all just selfie photos of some sleazy Russian chick doing the duck face and she has 400k followers. Mad jealous.

How does anyone get 400k followers for an entire feed of selfies?

I should also mention she has giant boobs

Mystery solved.

But I only use my boobs for good, not evil.

I will never hit 400k. Sigh.

If I repost some photos don’t be mad. I can’t keep track anymore.

I had organised all my photo folders via year, then month then by date and THEN finally via a system of colour coded references that meant certain things.

  • Grey means unsorted RAW files.
  • Orange means people who may or may not be acceptable to post online.
  • A purple folder means not posted on the blog (but may have posted on Facebook, although this is not a constant)
  • Yellow means this was a similar theme across multiple folders. E.g. Portobello junk markets.
  • No colour means this folder has been dealt with or is so unworthy it will not even be colour referenced.
  • I’m not sure what red means, but I think it looks too alarming. Code red should be for a photo folder emergency, should one ever occur.

But Instagram has thrown my beautifully ordered system into chaos. I could mark the folders blue to denote that this has been posted on Instagram but then it conflicts with the blog colour ref of purple.

Systems systems so many systems. So many things to do, so little time, so much guilt.

If only I had more readers to justify all this guilt and more importantly, my ego.

How many times have I used ‘I’ in this post?

Quite a lot.

But I don’t think I can get away with the royal ‘We’ just yet.

I’m working on ‘Our Glorious Leader’ but that will be for my loyal minions, when I have established my Republic which will be run with a velvet hand in an iron glove.

Adios 2.5 readers of this crap.

Now see here below – I done a drawing of a thingummy.

Jana said it looked like a Dandy Krishna, so Dandy Krishna it is.

Dandy Krishna

Dandy Krishna

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16 thoughts on “Guilt Guilt and More Guilt. I’m almost a Catholic.

  1. I think he kinda looks like a David Bowie Krishna… >___>
    Oh god, internet games. I play this one… called “Robot Unicorn Attack”… sigh……..

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