Perin, Leo’s Imaginary Girlfriend

I’m going to fail, I just know it in my bones.

Let me tell you a little story about Leo, and the lie that lost control…

Did you know Leo had an imaginary girlfriend for nearly 6 months?

1984 explains how if a lie if told often enough, it is eventually accepted as the truth…

A long, long time ago, Leo told me he had a girlfriend. A girlfriend called ‘Perin’.

Being the wonderful human being that I am, of course I was overjoyed for him. He was getting laid, I wasn’t, but hey, I live vicariously. So I ask him all about Perin, what’s she like blah blah blah. He’s being all elusive and coy (Leo is a bit of a coy boy) and I can’t get a concrete answer.

But I learn she’s a Bavi, is jealous, cute and sort of pale. Then one fateful day I call Leo up, and there seems to be a lot of background noise, I assume he must be partying somewhere.

So what if its 1:00 in the afternoon? Leo gets drunk anytime.

He says he can’t talk busy and so forth, sounds serious. Later however he informs me that Perin and he were breaking up. She kept nagging and was jealous of him hanging out with other women, he says.

I’m all sympathy. No more living vicariously.

So 2-3 years later, we are talking about Leo’s many women (many being relative when compared to celibacy, of course)…Laila, Perin and some chick from Baroda.

Leo complains he hasn’t had very many but I mention…

…Perin, Laila, that chick from Baroda, in a comforting way.

(‘Perin’ has come up often in conversation but I mention this purely as an example.)

Another year goes by, we are discussing women again,

…Perin, Laila, that chick from Baroda are brought up again.

Leo suddenly turns to me as says

“Listen Janine, there was no Perin. I just made her up.”

Why Leo, why??

“I don’t know I just made her up but you kept bringing her up in conversation so…..”

Leo is a sad, sad boy.

His virginity has probably grown back.

Anyway if anyone meets him or chats to him, or goes on his blog, ask him about ‘Perin’.

She’s about 5 foot 3, pale yellow skin, Parsi nose, her father is called Homi and her mom is called Pervis.

They live somewhere nonexistent in Colaba. Her favorite fictional colour is purple and on her imaginary birthday Leo gave her a faux gold-plated necklace. She is allergic to plums, eggs, cat hair, peanuts and dust.

We do not know Perin’s surname since she is entirely a figment of Leo’s mind. Now I’m really curious about what the sex was like. It must have been as good as he imagined it.

People, Perin cannot die, she was created and now she will live forever on this blog.

And hopefully on Leo’s.

Just like the name ‘Forum’


2 thoughts on “Perin, Leo’s Imaginary Girlfriend

  1. Pingback: An Embarrassing Drunk Incident « Tin Roof Press

  2. Pingback: Leo Replies « Tin Roof Press

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