Crits begin at 10:30 am sharp. Wednesday the 11th of October.
Last night I was desperately trying to sketch, hoping I might struggle to make up the ‘quota’ of one weeks work in a day. I wasn’t successful, as Kurt brusquely informed me.
So I woke up at 7:30 worrying about everything, Belle Gray hadn’t paid me, A&M [the previous estate agents] had sent me a cheque instead of transferring the money into my account and I realized unless I deposited it IMMEDIATELY I’d be overdrawn in 6 days when I needed to pay my rent.
OK, OK don’t panic don’t panic! If you leave at 9:00 am- Thats 10 mins for the bus, run to the bank, deposit the check be out by 9:30am run to college and boom I’m done.
So some time later at 9:30, while drinking my tea, it occurred to me that I was DEFINITELY going to be late. Foz’s rage against lateness makes my stomach churn on crit days. What would I do? What would I do?? If I was overdrawn I’d be fined! If I was late I’d be crucified!
So I sent him a text, saying “Urgently need to go to the bank. Will be late. This is Janine” I hoped that I might still make it if I was out of the bank by 9:45am.
Being the hugely lucky person that I am, the bank didn’t open on a Wednesday until 10:00 [ONLY Wednesdays], and on this particular wednesday not until 10:15am
PANIC!!! STOMACH CRAMPS!! What if Foz never got my text?? What if his number changed? What if I had it wrong? I sent Fernanda a text saying I’d be late. Could she please let Foz know?
OK, thats all fine. Minor stomach spasms only.
BUT WAIT!! WHAT IF FERNANDA SKIPS CLASS??
So I sent the same text to Onnalin.
I did worry that they might both bunk class, but I tried to quash my growing paranoia.
Pacing frantically outside the bank, my huge backpack cracking my fragile collar bones, loaded with files, laptops, cables, clothes and I waited and waited. Finally a guy with a limp opened up. A large black lady told him off volubly.
“Nobody appreciates me, no one even thanks me, why do I even bother I don’t know?” he moaned.
Dumped the cheque, panicked a little bit incase my sort code and account number was wrong. Was it 30-19-96? Like a date? or 19-30-96? FUCK why cant I remember? I’ve done it loads of times? What the fuck is wrong with me??
Then I ran to the tube made it to college at 10:37am exactly. I hesitate briefly, and buy a hot chocolate.
I noticed everyone standing casually outside smoking, this is odd, I thought to myself. I checked my phone, perhaps I had the wrong time. I really ought to set my phone ahead. But the problem with that is then I know its 15 mins fast so I’m mentally always 15 mins late. Ideally someone else should do it for me when I’m not looking.
Apparently, Foz had an urgent meeting, he would be late. Crit would start at 11:00am
I have been seriously emotionally scarred by all of this. Not to mention all the stomach spasms.
Because its 11:38am now and the crit still hasn’t started.
I cant stand this fucking stress.