My policy of only smoking while drinking isn’t quite working out quite so well lately.
In London, where I drink once a week or so this is a great policy.
In Bombay some fool (Leo) or the other is usually sirening me
(is that a verbable word? Is verbable a word?) outside with booze and fags, so I’ve been smoking like a stove every evening for a week.
I now have a very throaty voice, which would be very sexy if I wasn’t hacking up phlegm every 5 minutes.
“Well hello there…..may I have a light?”
I might ask huskily, dressed in a slinky number and patent red shoes. Followed by…
“COUGH COUGH COUGH HACK WHEEZE CHOKE!”
Last night I coughed so violently, I came treacherously close to approving of the smoking blanket ban.
NO NO!! NEVER! GET THEE GONE EVIL VILE KEN LIVINGSTONE AND HEALTHY PUSHY ASSHOLES!
If anything it makes me more determined than ever.
For so long as I can breathe and swallow, I shall smoke and drink Amen!