Shorn

Just got to the ex’s place after returning from the gulag (Savoy Tailors Guild).

The over paid, fat head, toad faced managing directors were there being generally annoying and having their ugly, red faces photographed for some Moss Bros porno mag.

I rearranged the ties and tidied up with unadulterated MAness all day.

O. was talking about how people cut off their hair when they have a breakup. She suggests it’s the desire for a physical change to mark the emotional change. Maybe it’s just a clean slate.

I tell the ex that I sometimes just feel like just chopping off all my hair, just shaving it right off.

I am informed, no sorry, threatened that should I ever do so I would very shortly be single.

This fucks me right off immediately.

I mean its fucking hair, it grows back whats the big deal? You don’t dump someone over hair surely?

At the very least have the decency not to say it out loud. Don’t say it at all if possible.

So we get into this stupid row about an even stupider hypothetical question and other future hypothetical questions like:

What if my nose falls off will you dump me then?

Or what if I have cancer or get fat?

(Isn’t it sad how fat, cancer and my nose are all equated on the same line?)

and now we are both sulking on the couch as I type this.

Time to roll I think.

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5 thoughts on “Shorn

  1. don’t shave your head man. at the rate your hair is going, it’ll fall off soon enough anyway. then you can have the last laugh. (so to speak.)

  2. I’m not planning too my head is too much like a large melon. it was just a random passing thought besides i love girls with short hair. the whole Audrey Hepburn boi-girl look. so yummy

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