Monday: Georgina’s Birthday

Georgina's Birthday. The highlight of our sad sad MA-less lives.

Georgina’s Birthday. The highlight of our sad sad MA-less lives.

Simeon bowled like an old pro, the 3 steps and all that. Anna was lobbing the bowling balls across the alley like it was tennis. I distinctly heard the alley crack under the weight at some point.

Illustrators being very perverse creatures means that by the end of our girls vs boys match Anna somehow won even beating professional 3 stepper Simeon. I managed to get 4 double zero’s in one game. I’m almost proud. It took a lot of effort on my part to miss so often.

The ex turned up tired as hell. We were both a bit jumpy I suppose at this point. I was forced to go out and smoke now and then. (Fucking smoking ban. I hope they all die.)

It was a lot like being back in Mumbai, smoking in the rain again. The Xaviers class was divided into smokers and non-smokers. One of the reasons I became a smoker was because the people I’d rather talk to (and one cutie in particular) would stand next to the buniya-wala where the dean couldn’t spy them, and puff away on Bensons. All the cool people would be outside gossiping as they smoked while all the non smoking losers sat inside sucking eggs. I’ve never enjoyed egg sucking personally.

Foz turned up at 8ish and immediately the place where we were sitting started to flood. Curious that. Martyn, always minutely observant, claimed it smelled like spunk. I cannot confirm such a claim but will defer to Martyn’s expert opinion.

The ex had been reading my blog during our little ‘sabbatical’……and where once Leo & the Mexican midget were considered ‘threats’ (anyone I blog about) they have now switched to: Onnalin, Fer, Dan and Foz. (Leo really? come on now, give me some credit)

Onnalin began by consolidating this bad opinion by telling the ex that we had a smooch some time ago ‘haha’ and then by saying something else EVEN STUPIDER during a drunken moment (always) which at the time really, really, really PISSED ME OFF!!!!!!!

I was really banging on the keys back there but I feel calmer now. *deep breath deep breath*

The ex was mildly offended of course, but got over it but I still haven’t if I’m honest.

I feel inwardly seething.

*deep breath deep breath*

Simeon leaves early because his girlfriend has ‘a nice bit o’ fish to cook for him’ and so off he goes. Sheesh.

I’ve never left an evening because of fish. Work yes, tired yes, hung over yes, fish no no no.

Foz shake his head in disapproval. Clearly all his influence and 2 year MA training hasn’t worked on Simeon.

I’m informed that my blog is losing its edge Foz says. Clearly I haven’t blogged about him enough already. Yes yes, he agrees, there isn’t enough about him lately. I order him to yell at someone just for blogertainment-value-for-money. He doesn’t comply. I’m deeply disappointed. I really look forward to random people getting bollocked.

How I can blog about anyone unless they’re around on a weekly basis, aren’t pretending to be gay (or really being gay) and don’t even yell at people anymore?

Those are my priorities: Being gay, yelling and just hanging around. (I’m easily pleased what can I say?)

Sigh. I sense a decline in my readership. Leo is a classic example. Only comments when I mention him, complains in a hurt tone when I don’t.

The ex and I were being all cuddly-wuddly and shit all evening. It made me slightly nervous because we’re usually relatively discrete (relatively). At some point we did have a slight glitch in the works and the ex went off home before me. I blame it all on nerves really, I felt pretty tense. Shortly after I went home and all was well.

Mostly.

PS – Georgina got her fingers rammed in between 2 bowling balls. Martyn and Adam resident medics both insisted it was fine. Broke in 2 places apparently.

Our Shoes

Our Shoes

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9 thoughts on “Monday: Georgina’s Birthday

  1. cant believe you went bowling, truly terrible game. theres something very uncomforting about having to wear someone else shoes when playing a ‘sport’. and more to the point those bowling shoes are fucking hideous. since when has the pre-requistite of any game been that you should be dressed as a slightly crap clown? cricket,football,snooker etc those are real games, bowling is shite. i rather play with a different set of balls any day of the week. ( i didnt mean that to sound as gay as it does)

  2. what are you talking about? have you seen tennis outfits and cricket? Who wears all white after labour day darling and I dont even know what that means. The shoes were the highlight. I only feel bad for anyone who got martyn’s since only last week he was complaining that he just got athletes foot. Is that catching?

  3. remind me never to attempt reading your blog with leo around (“read the comments” “i will. after the post.” “no read the comments. it has nothing to do with the post.” “ok. in a bit.” “no read the comments.”). your genius theory about fags making kids less cranky – untrue. crocs, clogs, bowling shoes and exs – they’re not supposed to make sense or look pretty.

  4. why whats in the comment section? Does he mean one of the comment section on another post where some anon person and I sent a large amount of time insulting him before moving onto his blog’s comment section to insult him? It was highly entertaining.

Deranged comments preferred

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