Number 2.

My Hiding Hole

There are 3 loos on the top floor of where I work.

I like to sit in there for a while as a kind of time out, also to prevent myself from going outside and smoking.

Sometimes I sit there so long that the light which is movement sensitive, turns itself off.

I have to wave my arms rapidly to turn it back on again or sit in the dark.

However the tiny pleasure of sitting in the loo is being ruined by a couple of things.

1. Lack of ventilation. Those loos really stink man. Especially in the morning when some unknown man/woman has a poo.

2. Someone broke the seat in the middle loo leaving only 2 usable toilets which means there is a que. The que kills my desire to sit in the loo instead of standing outside and smoking too much.

3.  Daily usage of these 3 loos and made me realise that some men are incapable of peeing like normal hygienic humans. Sometimes the loos are completely unusable because some filthy fuck has pissed all over the toilet seat and probably down his pants.

What is it with men and toilets bowls? Are they incapable of aiming? It’s a huge ceramic bowl, they have a movable flesh-hose and a pair of hands. How hard can it possibly be to hit the target accurately??

Men and women should never have to pee in the same place. I’m thinking of writing a strongly worded complaint about the unhealthy amount of urine around the first floor loo seats.



6 thoughts on “Number 2.

  1. Firstly, am one of your many readers..shy/lazy about commenting thus far! Clearly men and their woeful lack of basic pee technique touches (eww!) my confidence chord. :-/

    Men and women should TOTALLY have separate bathrooms. in fact, it should be declared a capital offence not to… Having said that, there are plenty of women who should be banned from public loos as well! So, I think, what I ready want is portable, individual loos..yeah, that’s it!

  2. don’t sit in the loo for longer than necessary…read up on piles or hemeroids! after that you’ll make sure you don’t over do it. though if it’s a battle between too much cigs and potential chance of piles…well i don’t know which side should win.

  3. The refurbished and much-hyped St Pancras station with it’s £10,000-a-night suite does still have facilities for men and woman.

    Both are clearly defined: The women’s – by it’s inadequate berths, which generate ridiculous queues round the block. The men’s – by the urine on the floor, the yellow & black warning tape, the faulty plumbing and broken urinals.

    However, there are no such facilities in station’s gastro-pub, The Betjemen Arms. Which is annoying because there used to be when it was called the Shires, before it was all done up. Twats.

  4. I think clearly, I must have more potty/su-su posts seeing all the comments this complaint has inspired.
    I love comments.

    @ Serendipitis comment more! i love comments

    @ Ratna i’ve been coughing violently since the 24 of april – i’m feeling quite worried now. the piles is less of an issue.
    It was really bad for a week, and now I think the cough is finally fading but its also sort of lingering slightly which is worrying me more than if it was a horrible frog cough. I saw this house episode where this girl just thinks she has a little cough and then house tells her you have a month to live its lung cancer. and she didnt even smoke. oh god i’m gonna die.

    @VOB: I think a Prince Charles..or is it a Prince Phillip understandably can cause problems.

    But still I think its only common courtesy to wipe up your mess before you leave the loo. The men on the first floor clearly have no such ideas.

    I have considered the loo issue all morning.
    I think a rude notice above the toilet bowl (anonymously) might do the trick
    I have another solution which I may also post later.

Deranged comments preferred

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