The Trials Of Trappy

It’s been a few weeks since I bought my venus flytrap plant.

Frankly, I’m growing quite concerned for poor wee Trappy.

That’s the direction of name I’m leaning towards. We tried Penelope, and we tried Evelyn, but Trappy seems to have stuck. (Sorry Moof. I stole your name. It’s very catchy.)

Trappy isn’t doing so good.

Partly through sabotage, and partly my own over enthusiasm that is slowly but surely killing it.

After reading endless FAQ’s and trawling a variety of websites, it was finally drilled into my skull that even Britta filtering the water doesn’t really get rid of the minerals. (London is a hard water area, and Trappy is very finicky.)

Rain water or distilled water seemed to be the thing generally advised.

Ironically we’re were having a lovely warm spell at the time. Even when there were a few days forecast for rain, it’s an absolute bitch trying to get rain water. No one tells you that. Collecting untainted rainwater is virtually impossible.

You can’t scoop it out of a puddle (I did think of that) so I nagged at the ex to let me put some jars outside in the vain hope it might catch some rain water.

After berating me about bringing home jars and taking up room, it turns out we don’t have enough jars.

Then the jar I finally was able to wheedle off the ex, and stuck outside got nicked by some unknown person. (The ex was angry that the jar was now lost. Lost forever. Oh jar! Where are you jar? Why jar?)

The large planter I emptied and washed out kept getting blown over by the wind.

I started having bad dreams about bad water and Trappy dying. Suddenly everything depended on Trappy’s survival.

One night the ex came home drunk and stuck a finger in all of Trappy little traps while my back was turned, and forcibly closed them.

I flipped the fuck out. Like proper flipped out. I won’t go into it but I was so enraged I slept on the couch. (Thank god we have a new couch. I’d never had fit on the Leopard print couch.)

Luckily Trappy recovered by the next morning and the ex apologised so I managed to calm down. (One trap didn’t recover. It turned black and dropped off.)

I must confess the whole drunken, Trappy sabotage incident soured my love for Trappy.

For a while l felt both deeply paranoid and yet simultaneously resigned to Trappy’s death. Trappy feels ‘ruined’ now. I think I want a new one. A clean one. An untainted Trappy.

After about a week of worrying about Trappy’s water, I just bit the bullet and bought 5L of pure distilled water online.

I know. But why do things by halves? The water cost 6 times as much as Trappy did.

It turns out the dome the ex kindly bought me to house Trappy was creating too much humidity. (The Venus Flytrap forum I joined like a mega-nerd diagnosed the problem promptly.)

Also one of the flies I fed Trappy gave it indigestion. (Yes, they get indigestion. It’s a hilarious plant)

All this doesn’t bode well for wee Trappy. And it’s only a few weeks old!

I don’t know if I should bother with an artificial daylight bulb.

Maybe I’ll just wait and see how soon this one dies.

It can be my trial run.

The good thing is there are a number of new shoots sprouting. So it can’t be all bad news?

Can it?? Can it????

Trappy!! Naaaaaaaaaaahiiiiiiin!!!

(Translation: Trappy! Nooooooooooooo!! )

Muth mar jao!!

(Translation: Don’t die)

Trappy on the window in its little dome

Trappy on the window in its little dome

Trappy. It's a cloudy day.

Trappy not looking so hot.  One trap turned black and one yellowing swiftly.

Dome in the Kitchen

Dome in the Kitchen with all the herbs.

Dome Foggy on the kitchen window sill.

Dome Foggy on the kitchen window sill. This should really have tipped me off that it was far too humid.

Dome Blurry. I really like things under domes.

I really like things under domes.

Black Spots have developed. Apparently the dome is too humid.

Black Spots have developed because of the humidity. Poor Trappy.


22 thoughts on “The Trials Of Trappy

  1. Poor Trappy, what an ordeal he/she has had (he? she?). Please don’t let the ex ruin you for Trappy, it’s not his/her fault! But I do think it’s hilarious that those plants can get indigestion.

    • I know isnt it? Who knew? Apparently you mustn’t feed them more than a fly a week. I havent fed Trappy in a few weeks since I need him to recover a little from the ordeal. The ex closing the traps was really the least of the problem. The humidity was what really fucked it. Also when i plant looks sad you just think, fuck it, get a fresh one. But i’m persevering and also trying to care less.

  2. Love that bell jar. Very Sylvia Plath.
    YOu can get distilled water lots of places for not a lot of money– at hardware stores or auto supplies (they use distilled for car batteries). It shouldn’t have to be this hard!

  3. Oh the ordeals of Trappy. But well done you for diagnosing the problem. Distilled water is very easy to get in garages. We may even have some in the boot of our car for emergencies (not Trappy kind though more for the car batteries).

  4. I am so pleased that Trappy lives again ❤ ❤
    I'll tell you, we had Trappy I, II and III… with Trappy I and II, I was also quite overzealous, filtered water, little insects, bell jar, da da da… end result, death. Trappy III was more or less left to his own devices (we did put him into a flat dish that we kept filled with water, so he could suck water from the bottom), but no feeding, no humidity–outside in the summer, inside the rest of the year, in a window. He lived for 1.5 years!! His untimely death was due to a snap frost (we didn't bring him in on time one fall and it got too cold…)
    Good luck, but on the pictures, your Trappy looks the picture of health…! Maybe there is hope still.

    • yes that’s what I too have discovered. Leave Trappy alone! 🙂 Trappy still lives! well we won’t leave trappy outside i think. we live in a concrete block and its not private outside. I bet he’d get nicked. I do really want to feed him again though. But im waiting for the new shoots to grow a bit.

  5. Why is Trappy living in a dome again?

    Probably the Ex is jealous. There is only room in your life for one vagina dentata.

    But you should persevere now on Trappy’s behalf. I cannot think well of you if you resign her to an unhappy fate.

    –You can’t buy distilled water in London?

    • Well I just ordered it online. Its easier than hunting for it. Well i went on and on about the dome and humidity so the ex bought me one. Which was sweet. Who knew Trappy, like Plath would resent it so?

  6. Where can I buy my ” I’m rooting for Trappy” t-shirt? I had a similar problem with a Venus fly trap years ago but in those pre-Internet days, wasn’t able to diagnose the problem. She died and I’ve never touched another houseplant since. Maybe I need counselling…

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