A Week of Highlights

This was my visa application. It cost £25 to send! 25!!!!! Those bastards!

This was my visa application. It cost £25 to send! 25!!!!! Those bastards!

I spent all weekend organising scanning and printing my mammoth visa application. I had to scan every document I sent just in case they lost it. (An entire folder, 10 years of documents, payslips, certificates. Yeesh.)

I printed out Indexes, personal letters, cover letters, introduction letters, explanation letters, stickers on each folder page, numbered the documents sent. Good grief! (Monty, my visa counsellors, advised me to do all this. God knows if it helps.)

This might not seem like a highlight, but just getting it done after months of fretting about it IS a highlight.

Just look at that monster.

The UKBA are now so absolutely shameless they even ask the applicant to send them xeroxes. God forbid they do it themselves.

I suppose they are massively understaffed and over worked. But still. For £991 pounds the least they can do is pay for their own xerox copies.

So off went the folder on Monday.

Then I sold some prints. More on that here

THEN

YES!!! THEN!! ALL CAPS

I MET ADAM BUXTON!!

(Half of the duo I’m a geekazoid fan of – Adam and Joe)

Not for the first time did I earnestly wish I was less awkward, more suave and just one of those people who swim so effortlessly through social waters.

Someone on Facebook suggested (rather brilliantly) that instead of relying on my social skills (nil) I ought to print out some of the fan art I did for the show and give it to Adam.

Adam & Joe

Adam & Joe Guide Cover

So Emma and I stood outside after the show with 3 prints rolled up, waiting for Adam. Emma and I couldn’t have been more nervous and twitchy looking. We hopped about on each foot, getting twitchier and twitcher as time went on.

I asked one of the ushers where should we wait if we wanted to meet Adam.

The usher said straight off the bat,

“Why do you want to meet him?”

This stumped me a bit. There is no logical reason a fan wants to meet their object of affection.

So I said the worst thing you can say in such a situation,

“Oh no reason, I just want to give him something…”

As soon as the words had left my mouth I realised how perfectly dubious that could sound.

“Well he’ll be in through the green room over there.”

replied the usher.

But looking Emma in the corner, still twitching and then at me, he seemed to re-consider this statement

“…but you probably shouldn’t go in though…”

“No no, I won’t go in! We’ll just wait outside.”

I reassured him.

The idea of rocking through the green room, uninvited and unknown, appalled me. The awkwardness, the blatant impoliteness filled me with a shuddering horror.

So the usher, now throughly unsure himself, went away, probably to consult with Adam.

“Just wait over there,”

he said pointing in the direction of a large charcoal drawing of a curvaceous nude (very beautiful line work)

Then he came back and asked for our names. (Yes, definitely, he had consulted with Adam or Adam’s wrangler.)

I gave my name to him and thinking I ought to reassure him again said,

“Don’t worry, I’m not a stalker.”

The usher looked startled.

Emma twitched even more and was mortified.

“No no…”

he mumbled as he ran off again, all embarrassed politeness. One of the things I love about Adam and Joe and those associated with them is you can count on everyone being terribly polite about everything.

The whole meeting was riddled with awkwardness. I was blushing furiously, Emma (my wingwoman) was still twitching, neither of us being in the habit of meeting celebrities and Adam was apologising for being on the back foot (as he called his cold and general ramblyness of the show.)

But he was so nice about it all even though I could tell he felt as awkward as we did. Emma even got a great photo of me next to him. (Oh God! So awkward! Poor Adam.)

BTW: How paltry and lame are my drawings compared to this masterpiece?

The way he painted in the beard and eyebrows made my jaw drop.

Damn you skilled people! I’m determined now, to redraw the beard. (Eventually, after the breeding drawing)

Also Adam later emailed to thank me for the drawings. How nice was that??! What a great celebrity.

Me & Adam, forced to hold up my drawings

Me & Adam, forced to hold up my drawings

Ah! Adam Buxton. With his luscious mane and cuddlesome face.

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27 thoughts on “A Week of Highlights

  1. Great post 🙂 Neither of you look nervous in that pic, but I did chuckle reading about the leadup to the meeting. Lully, lully Buckles xo
    Also, nearly a thousand pounds for a visa?! and all that paper??! Christ on a bike!

  2. You look nothing like nervous. And thats the best part about meeting the object of your affection, you can turn into a nervous giggly girl for a change and nobody will care, because thats how its meant to be 😛

  3. “No, no, I’m not a stalker or anything . . .”

    –“That’s a clever disguise you’ve got, Bond.”
    –“What?”
    –“White face in Harlem.”
    –“Live and Let Die” (1973)

    But what we need to know is: when do you get a love call from Emma Bunton, requiring you to do her portrait?

    It’s well and good to feel gushy about meeting your idol now, but what happens if he’s really impressed by your work?

    Then it’s like “All About Eve”, or something . . .

  4. Is that by any chance Adam and Joe from Adam and Joe Go Tokyo?!? (we LOVED that show….. the cute British guys… lost amongst the Japaners…!)

  5. “Oh no reason, i just want to give him something” she said, and with that she proceeded to plunge a dagger deep into her quivering breast and extract her still beating heart covered in its sticky carmine blood. “Give this to adam would you?…but tell him i’m not a stalker!” And then situation got awkward,

    • Its a sign of greatness to have a long name. If anything you should add more names to it. Add kardo and Sadi’s names. Aleksia’s name, your aunty’s name. THEN it would be amazing

  6. Pingback: Fog, Gloom & Christmas Lights « Tin Roof Press

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